{"title":"Tapir","description":"\u003cp\u003eTwenty million years and no revisions.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHorses were the size of dogs when this design went into production, and it has not been meaningfully updated since. Ice ages arrived. Continents rearranged. Entire orders of mammal came, peaked, and went extinct with better press. The tapir kept the nose.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt's not a pig — its closest relatives are the horse and the rhino, which shows up in the toes: four in front, three behind, hooved. The nose is a short prehensile trunk that strips leaves, grabs fruit, and doubles as a snorkel, because tapirs deal with predators by sinking to the bottom of a river and \u003cem\u003ewalking along it\u003c\/em\u003e until the problem is elsewhere.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt eats fruit whole, walks for miles, and leaves the seeds behind. Half the rainforest is standing because a tapir went for a stroll and didn't think about it too hard.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSix hundred pounds. Communicates in a thin, high whistle. Has nothing left to prove and has never had anything left to prove.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"howling-tapir-tee","title":"Moon Howlers: Tapir Airbrush Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe tapir has never been photographed howling at the moon, mostly because it does not howl. This did not stop the artist. What you get is a large portrait of a tapir gazing into the middle distance, stacked above a smaller tapir tipping its snout back toward a full moon over a fog-covered ridge, rendered in the exact warm cream and gold airbrush style that used to show up on wolf shirts at truck stops.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt is printed on a dark tee so the double-exposure glow actually reads the way it's supposed to. Wear it if you have ever thought a tapir deserved the same mythic treatment as a wolf. We happen to agree.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePhotorealistic double-exposure tapir artwork, warm cream and gold on dark fabric\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex tee, true to the classic 90s nature-shirt fit\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFull moon, misty landscape, and a tapir taking it very seriously\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Moon Howlers line — one joke, many animals\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Pepper \/ M","offer_id":58416425795848,"sku":"77345793437671251843","price":41.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ L","offer_id":58416425828616,"sku":"27013654586266859086","price":41.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ XL","offer_id":58416425861384,"sku":"23292423374279923933","price":41.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 2XL","offer_id":58416425894152,"sku":"10316695263882476218","price":45.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 3XL","offer_id":58416425926920,"sku":"24231442688968598684","price":51.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1056\/9288\/9352\/files\/10971132039504916940_2048.jpg?v=1786446327"},{"product_id":"howling-tapir-sweatshirt","title":"Moon Howlers: Tapir Crewneck Sweatshirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eSomewhere between the airbrush stand at the county fair and the back of a 1994 tour van, this design was always going to happen. We just supplied the tapir. He is rendered in soft cream and gold, double-exposed against a full moon and a misty tree line, doing what the artwork demands: howling.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Moon Howlers line takes the classic nature-tee format completely at its word and hands the microphone to animals who were never consulted about wolves getting all the credit. This week it's the tapir's turn to look soulful under a dark sky on a dark crewneck.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eLarge portrait of the tapir up top, small howling scene below\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePhotorealistic double-exposure artwork in warm cream and gold tones\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePrinted on a dark crewneck sweatshirt\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Moon Howlers series — every animal gets a turn\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Pepper \/ S","offer_id":58416444277000,"sku":"94533036210438761519","price":83.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ M","offer_id":58416444309768,"sku":"17533448436478277608","price":83.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ L","offer_id":58416444342536,"sku":"26423904113999927246","price":83.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ XL","offer_id":58416444375304,"sku":"19795696836674115683","price":83.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 2XL","offer_id":58416444408072,"sku":"80155917563097838288","price":97.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 3XL","offer_id":58416444440840,"sku":"25054803906404575660","price":111.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1056\/9288\/9352\/files\/6330634743176093396_2048.jpg?v=1786446354"},{"product_id":"howling-tapir-sticker","title":"Moon Howlers: Tapir Sticker","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe tapir was not part of the original nature-tee lineup, and honestly, that was an oversight. This kiss-cut sticker corrects the record with a full double-exposure portrait: a tapir gazing into the distance above a smaller tapir howling at a full moon over a foggy tree line, rendered in the warm cream and gold airbrush style that defined a very specific era of mall kiosk merchandise.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNo detail has been modernized. The mist is thick, the moon is enormous, and the tapir is treated with the same solemn reverence usually reserved for wolves. It sticks to laptops, water bottles, notebooks, or anywhere else that needs a moment of quiet, unexplained intensity.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eKiss-cut sticker with easy-peel backing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePhotorealistic double-exposure tapir artwork\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic 90s airbrush color palette\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Moon Howlers series\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"3\" x 4\" \/ Kiss-Cut \/ Glossy","offer_id":58419126731016,"sku":"91054963833080491293","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3\" x 4\" \/ Kiss-Cut \/ Holographic","offer_id":58419126763784,"sku":"18362223748806517554","price":5.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4\" x 6\" \/ Kiss-Cut \/ Glossy","offer_id":58419126796552,"sku":"12261255253262559000","price":7.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4\" x 6\" \/ Kiss-Cut \/ Holographic","offer_id":58419126829320,"sku":"23453246636164793258","price":10.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1056\/9288\/9352\/files\/5360830780031440114_2048.jpg?v=1786456021"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1056\/9288\/9352\/collections\/tapir-collection-5d916fe9.jpg?v=1786450118","url":"https:\/\/moonhowlers.store\/collections\/howling-tapir.oembed","provider":"Moon Howlers","version":"1.0","type":"link"}